Why do we act differently?

“You Don’t drink, don’t smoke, what do you do…Subtle innuendos follow…it must be something inside”

Adam Ant, Goody Two Shoes, 1982

Should we do this?  Should we not do that?  What should be our motivation?  That’s a stinkin’ lot of “should”.

I am thinking of three motives for behavior.

1.  Someone else thinks I should:  I do it out of respect, or obligation

2.  I think I should:  I respond out of my own sense of what “ought” to be

3.  It is true about me:   What is true in my heart is naturally transmitted through my actions

When I signed up for this Christianity thing, I did not sign up for any reason other than this:  What was true about me was not working, I needed something else to be true about me.  Because I was the thing I needed help with, I needed Someone Else to help.

Nothing personal, but, I didn’t sign up to help you, or anyone else.  I signed up because I needed help.  It’s been really helpful.  Many of the things that were once true about me…have actually been changed.  Being myself is not nearly as harmful to me and others as it once was.

Amazingly, the more “helped” I get, the more it seems to help others.  The more I get changed on the inside, the more the things that come out of me seem to actually help people.

I suppose that to act right because I should, is better than acting in destructive ways…but if I spend the rest of my life relying on what I “should” do as my motive, my heart will grow more and more sick.  I won’t tell you, becaue I “should” not be so sick.  And I won’t be honest with myself because I “should” have changed by now.  But I will keep doing what I should on the outside, while I die on the inside.

Apparently I still need help.  Perhaps that is the point.  I needed help to be someone different, and now I need help to be that new person in this moment.  “Helped” is way better than “should”.  You should  try it.